Of Pessimists and Optimists
by wittyness
Summary: Slowly, the light in his eyes was going out and my whole world was crashing down. He couldn't leave me…He couldn't! "Please don't die Nero. Please. I love you so goddam much." Warnings: Cursing character death hinted sexual themes
1. Chapter 1

Hello my lovely humans please tell me what you think of this I wanted to make a Virgil x Nero story but I didn't know what plot I should use and my friend said why not make one where it's somewhat AU but still somewhat like the game and this is what I got. So anyway tell me if your interested in reading more or if I should scrap this story

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I looked at the boy I loved as he wasted away into nothing. The bags under his once gleaming blue eyes seemed to frail his beautiful face even more then necessary. Every time he smiled it looked pained. Every time he laughed, his whole body hunched together in agony. Every time he said he was alright, the lie was apparent.

I kept going over happier memories. I kept thinking about all the plans we had made, all the dreams we wanted to chase.

But mostly I thought about the life we'd never have. The blue house with a white picket fence on the shore of Fortuna. We'd never have any of that. No adoptive children or saving the world one demon at a time.

Funny how Leukemia has a way of destroying things.

First it destroys your bone marrow causing you to bruise and bleed. Nero always used to smile and say it made him look tough. I on the other hand never understood his optimism.

The next stage is when it starts to destroy your white blood cells and slowly but surely your immunes system starts to break down and you find yourself with infection after infection. Nero always used to crack jokes about his body being at war with himself, he called the cancer the Demons's and the rest of his body the Hunters. He always fought just as hard.

Finally it destroys your red blood cells causing you to develop anemia and other serious complications. Nero never minded though, he was always too wrapped up in optimism and dreams bigger then the world to care. He wanted to show people anything was possible. He wanted the whole world to see that hope is found in even the weariest times.

All of these reasons were why I loved him so much, sometimes I find myself wondering what he ever saw in a guy like me? How did I deserve such a beautiful angel? I must be the luckiest guy on earth.

Except…he was fading.

Slowly, the light in his eyes was going out and my whole world was crashing down. He couldn't leave me…He couldn't!

"Please don't die Nero. Please. I love you so goddam much."


	2. wow 3000 words

APRIL

The first time I ever laid eyes on Nero was at Fortuna's skate rink.

I had gone through most of my teenage years bemoaning my life and acting out any way I could. I was angry. Just plain…angry. It wasn't directed at anything or anybody in particular, I was just another teenage youth running around hating a brother that didn't do anything but care too goddam much.

I was convinced that everyone was out to get me, the teachers at my school, my younger brother Dante, even my friends. Everyone was the enemy in my eyes; they were all deceiving me or at the very least planning to.

The fact that I had merely gone down to the stupid skating rink just to buy a bag of weed and pack of cigarettes from the owner should prove my point.

Everything from that point on had pretty much sent me into a whirlwind of fate.

"Let me in."

"Do you have ten dollars?"

"Yeah. It's just not for you. Now let me in shitface."

The lady behind me stammered and grunted.

"Pay the fee first. Then I'll unlock the doors. And watch your mouth; this is a family oriented place."

I leaned into the glass a bit more trying to look as irritated as possible which was exceedingly easy. "Let me in or I'll kick your scrawny ass all the way to fuckin Montana you little shit."

The bitch behind me gasped, covering her kid's ears in shock. "Excuse me!" She scolded.

I stretched a arm behind me and flipped her off. "Mind your own business." I hissed.

She spluttered and gasped. "I'm telling the manager. This is ridiculous!"

"Would you?" I sneered. "He is the man I need to see right now, right Agnus? I'm sure he'd love to see that you helped cause another scene."

Agnus looked at me terrified, probably wondering if I was actually serious. Oh I'm serious Agnus, dead serious.

Finally the doors clicked and I entered the room full of booming music and pulsing lights, flipping off the bitch once more before the door shut behind me.

I always kind of hated Fortuna's skate rink.

It was constantly full of screaming little brats and disgusting bubblegum pop music. Or…maybe I just enjoyed being morbid and partly hated when other people around me were joyous and happy.

After all, a pessimist's greatest threat is an optimist. It's like fire and ice, always clashing and doomed to live as enemies and opposites.

"Hey sweetheart, haven't see you around lately, was beginning to think you actually decided to take my advice."

In front of me stood a tall blond with big breasts and a skimpy outfit. Her name was Trish a long time employee at Fortuna's skate rink.

She was known mostly for bringing the cake out during birthday parties and spending the rest of her time prancing around in mini skirts and tube tops.

It came as no surprise that every prepubescent boy in town had requested she be the one to do so.

To me however, she was just a bitch that talked too much.

"I've been around. My old man found out about all the days I skipped and he had me on lock down for awhile."

"Oh yeah," A smirk. "How'd you break out?"

"Dante had an ear infection so Eva took him to the hospital. Father was asleep down stairs so I climbed through my window and bailed."

"Huh," Trish mused. "You're like a regular Holly Golightly."

"Who?"

"It's a movie kid, don't make me sound old. Anyways, at this one part the main girl climbed through her window to get away from some stupid drunktard and ended up going in through her downstairs neighbor's window and spending the night there. They didn't actually have sex or anything but I think if they did it would have taken away from some of the mushy romance." She sighed.

Apparently D cup Trish was a closet romantic.

I definitely wasn't.

"And how does that have to do with anything I just said? Besides the fact that we both climbed through a window, those two stories were completely different."

Trish waved her perfectly manicured hand, face still looking highly wistful. "One day you'll see Virgil, not every story is told on the surface, some things need to be thought about and looked at in a different angle before you can fully understand the similarities."

"You sound like a fortune cookie."

"Emphasis on the word fortune," She chirped. "As in your fortunate that I'm sharing my wisdom with you."

I snorted, almost forgetting my whole reason for coming here entirely. "Trish, where's Slink?"

"Oh," She smiled. "He told me to tell you to come out back when the session is over at four thirty. You got bout thirty minutes to kill, use it wisely."

I rolled my eyes as she skipped off once the intercom called her name.

Once she was out of sight I snorted.

Sometimes Trish is just all kinds of crazy, I find myself wondering if silicone had a way of fucking with your head. It'd explain a whole of shit, that's for sure.

For a moment I glanced over at the skate rental counter, eying the size tens and the idiot guarding them.

One of my life's little pleasures was messing with Ron. He was clumsy and forgetful and the jury's still out on whether or not he has a mental retardation.

Either way, it was fun to mess with his head and get him in trouble.

"Ronnie ol boy, how you been?" I waltzed over to the counter giving him a sly grin and in return he shot me a glare with squinty eyes.

"You plannin on renting a pair of skates?" He asked, completely ignoring my first question.

"Actually, I came to see how you've-"

"Save it. Rent some skates or go bother Trish."

I waved my hand back and forth slowly, trying to look nonchalant. "Ouch. Actually though that's one of the reasons and I wanted to talk to you."

Ronnie looked a bit more interested, pushing his glasses up and raising his eyebrow. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah man. I just finished talking to her and it sounds like she really has the hots for you dude."

He looked highly skeptical. Come on, take the bait fishy.

"Really? If this is a joke…"

"Of course it isn't! Would I lie to you man?"

"Yes."

"Okay, but would I lie about something as important as you potentially gettin laid?"

"Probably."

I rolled my eyes. "Alright fair enough but just to let you know, I've turned over a new leaf, I'm not looking out for only number one anymore, think of me as mother Teresa from now on."

"Last time you said that, my wallet had mysteriously disappeared."

"Take your wallet with you man, like I said, that's the old me. The new me is telling you Trish's waiting in the party room. She also said something about being extremely horney…"

Ron jumped over the counter without a thought and stumbled into the other room.

I grinned.

Hook, line, and sinker.

Victory!

I grabbed a pair of size ten rollerblades, grinning victoriously. Ah the little things, gotta love em'. If I could live my life just like I did a moment ago, tricking people and sweet talking until I got what I wanted, then I'd be a happy person.

Unfortunately though my parents insist that's not a life worth living. What do they know anyways? Both of em' born with silver spoons in their mouths, always content with doing what's needed to succeed and trying to brain wash me into being the same way.

Well I'm a free spirit.

A wild thing.

I won't let anybody put me in a cage.

"Never." I grunted, pulling on my skates, trying not to chuck my shoes at the whining little brat crying for his mom. Stupid kid needs to grow some dam balls.

The Skate rink, as it turns out, was horrendously crowded, filled mostly with gushy teenagers holding hands and little kids that needed to watch where they were going. The pounding boy band music wasn't helping either, causing me stepped on to the rink warily.

The floor was as smooth and I remembered it to be, perfect for gliding and speeding past people that were impossibly slow.

Granted I should be more careful considering I could squash half these kids like a pancake. But I was always one for pushing the limits.

I actually had three golden rules for avoiding an accident at Fortuna's:

3. avoid being within three feet of a kid more then three years your junior while on the rink.

2. Make sure your breaks work properly (rental skates = unreliable machinery.)

And 1, the most important rule of all, always watch where you're going.

Immediately though, I found myself breaking the number one rule.

Across the rink a kid about my age kept catching my gaze. He had slightly long snow white hair and a bright green shirt that had a picture of some headphones on it. The poor kid was clinging onto the wall for dear life as his skates fumbled back and forth.

Every time I rounded the rink I just couldn't help but look at him, something about him was drawing me in. Every couple minutes I found myself unconsciously moving closer to where he was clutching onto the wall.

Finally a little six year old devil zoomed by the kid, causing him to lose his balance and wave his arms around in panic.

I didn't really have time to think before I was skating across the rink, bumping into person after person as I left behind a trail of angry 'heys' and 'watch its.'

That annoying fucking voice in me was yelling 'don't let him fall, don't let him fall!' So I came up behind him just as he completely lost his footing and fell back, successfully turning myself into a human cushion.

We landed on the floor in a pile of limbs and arms; I got the brunt of the fall, groaning from the bruise that's bound to form when his skate accidently knocked into my knee. "

Fuck." I grunted. The boy however was laughing uncontrollably. "Exactly what part of this situation is funny to you?"

The mystery boy merely laughed once more and smiled. "The part when we fell of course!"

"You mean when you fell and I acted as your own personal air bag?"

"Well," yet another smile. "You didn't have to save me. Falling is half the fun anyways."

"Bullshit. You didn't look like you were having fun."

The boy's face fell quite a bit; he looked displeased in some odd way. "Do you always curse so much or only when you've been used as an 'air bag?'"

"Why exactly does it matter?"

"Well," He held up his hand and started counting off.

Literally.

"1. It's vulgar. 2. There are like, a million little kids here that are extremely impressionable. And 3. Its not necessary at all unless you're in a lot of pain."

I scoffed. "Maybe I am. Maybe I should sue."

"You're going to sue me because you saved me? What exactly did you think would happen when you intentionally came up behind me right as I was about to fall?"

"That daisies would pop out of the earth and god would appear to revoke all my sins. Now would you mind getting off of me?"

"I prefer Lilies. And if you admit you saved me and you wont sue, maybe I'll consider it."

My mouth actually cracked into a teeny tiny smile. There's something about this kid…I just can't put my finger on it. "Fat chance. I'm suing. I've suffered extreme emotional damage; I don't think I'll ever recover!" I put my hand to my forehead dramatically, playing faux hurt.

"Fine fine, Mr. Drama Queen, but I warn you, my mother's a lawyer and she can be a bitch when she wants to be. She'll sue the pants offa you."

"Never really like these pants much, she can have em'. Now, would you mind getting off of me, people are starting to stare y'know."

"Fine. But only if you tell me your name."

"Deal. But I want yours in return."

The boy nodded, once again smiling. Seems like this kid is all kittens and skittles. And oddly enough…it didn't bother me.

Even more crazier: I kinda liked it.

"The name's Virgil."

"Nero." His hand shook mine. "Nice to meet you Virgil."

"Likewise." I grinned as Nero pushed himself off of me.

Then, suddenly everyone on the skate rink stopped to stare as a group of crying kids and angry mothers rushed out of the party room screaming something along the lines of 'We want our money back, this isn't some strip joint, how are we supposed to explain that to our five year olds?'

"I'm not exactly sure what's going on," I whispered, getting that 'I'm about to be blamed for something' feeling. "But I think it may have been my fault."

Then I spied a very angry, very red looking ztrish rushing out of the party room followed by a flustered Ron and an irritated Agnus.

"Virgil!" Trish screamed, eyes filled with the fiery pits of hell.

"Shit." I muttered.

"What's happening?" Nero's eyes were wide but his expression still held this adventurous look, like this was some kind of challenge to him.

"Long story short: a group of five year olds probably learned what it is to jump somebody while they're bringing out a cake and try and suck their face off."

"Poor kids." He whispered.

"Poor me. That crazy bitch over there just yelled my name. We gotta get out of here!"

Nero stood, stretching out his hands and helping me up. Trish had finally spotted me, running her tall lithe body in our direction, followed by pretty much the whole staff. I grabbed Nero's hand tight.

"Time for a little lesson in skating. Hold on."

His eyes grew to the size of softballs as I started racing across the rink, pulling him along as he yelled crazy things like 'son of a juju bee!'

The kid was eccentric, I'll give him that.

I slammed into the emergency exit and immediately the fire alarm went off and the sprinklers turned on. Sounds of screaming could be heard just before the door shut behind us.

I continued to race down the block, dodging by standers and praying we don't fall again.

"Where exactly are we going?" Nero yelled as we just barely dodged an old woman and her dog.

"I know a place a few blocks from here! We should be safe there!"

Nero merely yelled in response. We were going full speed, about to go across a busy intersection that still had a little orange hand.

"Do you trust me?"

"What?"

"I said, do you trust me?"

"I don't even know you!"

"That's not the question I asked!"

"Fine yes! I trust you. I don't know why but I do!"

"Then close your eyes and don't let go!"

Nero did as I told him to, clutching onto my arm for dear life.

I let go of the control I had on that caged part of me and we whirled into the street, dancing around traffic gracefully as It maneuvered us through the honking horns and flashing lights. Once we reached sweet side walk again, I grabed hold of myself and caged that part of myself again. "Open your eyes Nero, we're not dead."

"Thank god. Can we please slow down now? I don't want to have my face peeled of the ground."

"Alright." Slowly but surely I started to put on my breaks, smiling as Nero started to release his death grip.

Thankfully we didn't fall again (which tends to happen when you start to break after going the speed of light.) Nero was still muttering crazy phrases and I was still laughing to myself all the while.

"So where's this little hide away Bonnie?"

"Right over here Clyde. Wha-…hey! Why I am the girl?"

"Well for starters you have a girlish laugh."

"What? You were giggling. Giggling! And you're saying I have a girlish laugh?"

"It's elementary my dear Watson."

"Humph. Oh, so now I'm Watson? The sidekick?"

"Would you quit complaining? Jeaze, such a pessimist."

"Whatever." I grunted. "We're here anyways."

"And where exactly would here be if you don't mind me asking?"

I looked up at the abandoned apartment complex.

It was once a big extravagant place to live where rich people like my parents could schmooze their money around.

Sometimes people would throw big annoying parties here where they could all talk about how much wealth they had and how their brain washed sons and daughters would grow up and be just like them. They would laugh at the less fortunate, drawing lines on the earth that stood for class and other despicable concepts.

But of course, those on top fall the hardest.

A man named Sanctus Ardenwell once lived here. He was a prideful man. A man with a lot of money, money that he had to do a lot of illegal things to get.

So it came as no surprise that his dynasty eventually fell and it was only a matter of time before the police would come for him as well.

Ultimately he did the cowardly thing and put a pistol in his mouth. Suffice to say after that nobody wanted to live here.

So the old building was abandoned and left behind to rot.

I however saw it as renewed, rebirthed, a place where I could come to think.

"It's my own personal hide out from the world." I stated simply.

The expression on Nero's face said he understood. After all, every teenager has a hide out from the world. A place where you go to think, somewhere secluded where the world can't come and fuck you up.

Sometimes it's your room or a small cave or a park or rooftop. The possibilities are endless; when you're a teenager everything is endless.

Then you become an adult and everything becomes pointless and worthless and soon you forget about all your hideouts from the world. You become cranky and dependent on coffee and affection and money.

In other words…your soul dies.

"Have you ever watched Peter Pan?" I inquired curiously as we made our way up the stairs.

"That's the one about the boy who never wants to grow up right?"

"Right."

"Yeah…when I was little I think, why?"

"Nothing. Just curious is all. I guess in some corny way I admire him."

Nero smiled, pushing open the heavy door, revealing the rooftop scenery just on the other side. "Because he never has to die?"

"Because his soul never has to die."

Nero giggled. See, he's the one with a girly laugh! "So tell me, how exactly does one's soul die?"

I looked around the rooftop for a second; every inch was gray and dusty from under usage. Of course I didn't come here for the dinky old roof it's self, I came for the atmosphere, the view. Just above our heads the stars were shining bright and the moon was emitting a soft glow. The weather outside was perfect; spring brought warm weather with cool winds and beautiful blossoming. The air around us even smelled like spring, slightly floral and enticing.

I laid back on a perfect spot for gazing at stars, Nero did the same moments later. "I suppose it can die a few different ways," I whispered. "It can be corrupted and blackened by trivial things like money and pride."

Nero hummed in response.

"Or by heart break and loss. I guess I'd be bitter too though if I actually lost something I cared about, aside from my free will that is."

"Well…I don't think that's entirely true…I don't even believe your soul can die. I've lost things before, valuable things, and I'm alright."

"I'm not talking about material objects-"

"Neither am I."

"Well? What exactly have you lost then?"

"That's besides the point Virgil. I may not know you too well, but from what I've seen, you keep dwelling so deeply on pessimism that you've become one of those people that fixates entirely on the problems instead of finding the solutions."

"Well if you're such an expert then why don't you enlighten me? How can one reincarnate their soul?"

"Simple: enjoy life. Enjoy all the obstacles, the little things that make things better. Enjoy falling on your butt because it's unexpected and fun. Enjoy having parents because they won't be around forever, believe me. Though most of all: enjoy all the craziness that life throws, the odd moments where you meet a stranger at a skate rink and run off with them. Those sorts of things are what bring a soul back. It's as simple as enjoying life."

So…maybe he was right. Maybe I've just been so bitter for so long that I can't even see what's right in front of me. I'm blind as a bat. Funny realization.

I heard some scribbling beside me, at first I thought it was all in my head, like the epiphany had sent me totally over the edge. Then suddenly Nero leaned over me, putting both his hands on either side of my waist. He smiled softly, a smile so bright that I thought an angel had fallen down from heaven.

"Does this make you uncomfortable or have I caught on correctly?"

I gulped, staring up at his perfectly pink lips with hunger. "Correctly." I muttered.

Nero teasingly licked his lips as I continued to stare. Slowly he leaned down and my mind abruptly burst into a million tiny flames as his lips got closer to mine. Then, at the very last second, he jerked his head to my ear.

"I want to give you something."

I didn't even have enough air or brain cells to give him some kind of conformation. In other words, I had become George bush in a sense: I couldn't pronounce more then one syllable words and I shouldn't be allowed to make major decisions.

At least for the time being anyways.

So of course it took me a moment to register that Nero had stood up, smirking and dusting himself off. Slowly my other self started screaming things at me, telling me not to let him leave.

All the brain cells were frantically running around screaming and panicking and asking 'what the hell just happened?' And then in some weird fantasy world, the head brain cell would burst in and say 'folks, he just ninja-ed us' and everyone would scream bloody murder in defeat.

"Where are you going?"

Nero smiled like nothing happened. "Home. I'm already forty five minutes late. My sister is going to freak!"

He opened the door frantically and I shot up, struggling to get my body back in order.

"But I thought…I thought you wanted to give me something!" My voice sounded so helpless and let down. Good bye dignity.

"Check your front pocket!" Nero yelled before retreating down the stairs.

I merely stared at the door he had gone through, reaching into my pocket, trying desperately to breathe.

I unfolded a small piece of pink paper, a post-it note as it turns out. Immediately I gaped.

I can already tell two things:

1. This will not be the last time I see crazy optimistic (and slightly sexy) Nero.

And 2. This boy is going to turn my world upside down.

Virgil, you're hot, misunderstood, pessimistic, and just my type. Apparently I have a thing for bad boys. 818-559-2467. Call me.


	3. LOL Dante

"Of course you should call him! What part of 'call me' do you not understand?"

"Uh…"

"Stop being a little immature child and be a man! Come on, its so entirely romantic Virgil, you can't pass this up. This is your notebook moment, your chance to do something that isn't pointless! You have to call him. Have to. In fact, if you don't, I'll cut your tiny nuts off!"

My brother was pacing around my room, screaming like we were being attacked by goddam demons. I had gone close to a week without even going near a demon inside was scolding me for not calling Nero(or as he put it his future mate) but another part of me(the sane part) was telling me this was just too good to be true.

I mean, there's always a catch, right?

Somebody couldn't be intelligent, optimistic, and incredibly cute at the same time. There had to be something wrong, he was just too perfect. He had to be hooked on heroin or he has some freaky bestiality fetish. I just…didn't trust this whole situation.

Actually…my pessimism didn't trust this whole situation.

So I did a noble thing, a desperate thing, a stupid thing.

I had turned to my brother Dante for advice. Oh lord.

"Are you listening Virgie? I'm going to inflict bodily injuries on you! I'm going to hang you by your own intestines and then I'm going to do the same to your family so your genes and your stupidity don't get passed around."

"But Dant, you're my family."

"Yeah well I'm thinking about committing suicide after realizing I'm related to somebody as incompetent as you."

Good ol' Dante. He was the temperamental type. The short fuse. He'll snap and rip your head off when he pleases. Unfortunately he also uses aggression as his way of affection.

If he's not trying to kill you then you're doing something wrong.

"Would you fuckin calm down? Goddam, keep hopping around like that and you just might drop a deuce."

"Yeah? Maybe I'll drop my foot up your ass!"

I rolled my eyes. "Look, I'm just a little nervous okay? We all know you're the one who apparently inherited the balls in this family."

"Dam straight, which is why I have his number right here."

Immediately his expression grew devious.

At that moment I knew I was in some serious shit.

"You wouldn't dare." I hissed.

"Oh, I would."

I shot up from the bed just as the little demon ran out my door and down the hall screaming that I was going to get married and have lots of babies.

Of course the bitch was too fast for me and soon I was enjoying a face full of door.

"Bitch," I screeched. "You better open this door or I'll go down to your bullshit school and tell all your whore friends you're pregnant!"

On the other side the devil himself cackled. "Don't you watch TV anymore Virgie? Teen pregnancy is practically idolized. Everybody would fuckin praise me."

Fuck!

"That's gross." I hissed. And this is exactly why I aint straight. Girls are disgusting.

"I'm dialing his number!" He cheered.

"Come on! I know deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep… never mind, I think I just proved myself wrong."

I froze when I heard my brother sing 'hello.'

"Is this Nero?" Pause. "Hi Nero, this is Dante, I'm Virgil's brother." (Yeah, that's still under debate.)

Suddenly I got an idea. I crept off to the garage for a few minutes, rummaging around and pulling out dad's old tool kit. I'm going to give this bitch a run for his money.

"Oh em gee, I can totally be the man of honor and it can be a summer wedding because summer is so in right now!"

I groaned.

I left them for five minutes and already they're planning my wedding.

One by one I started undoing each screw in the door, each one making a little clink sound when they hit the floor.

Finally, when the doorknob collapsed completely, I kicked the mother fucking door open, Chuck Norris style.

"I'm going to kill you, then I'm going to bring you back and kill you again, then I'm going to hire some giant ape to rape your mutilated corpse!"

Ah, brotherly love.

Dante screamed chucking the phone at the wall and kicking me in the balls before retreating out the door.

I would've run after him if it wasn't for the laughter I could clearly hear from the phone (that and I was practically disabled at the moment.)

So I crawled towards said phone, cursing the day me and friend had thought it was funny to hide my mother's birth control pills.

"H-Hello?"

Only laughter could be heard on the other line, pure unfiltered laughter. "S-S-Summer Wed…" Nero tried desperately to stop wheezing and laughing long enough to actually hold a conversation. "D-Dude your brother is comedy gold! Please wrap him up and send him to Dane Cook or something!"

"Or something." I muttered.

"Oh come on, lighten up, remember what we said about enjoying the little things?"

"Dante isn't a little thing. He's a big pain in my ass."

"Oh you're no fun. Anyways, I'm just glad to hear from you at all, I was beginning to think you wouldn't call."

At that very moment, I felt horrible. "I was! I really was. I was just nervous."

Then I shifted from feeling horrible to feeling utterly embarrassed in less than ten seconds.

I sounded just like a girl!

"Don't worry Virgie (Dante!) I won't bite."

"Yeah, whatever, kick me while I'm down why don't-cha?"

"Its not kicking, it's called playing soccer!"

I couldn't help but smile at that statement. "Can we stop talking about my girliness and start talking about our date?"

"Oh, is that still on? According to your brother 'we should just skip the chatter and have sex already.'"

"I'm game."

Nero chuckled. "You wish pansy boy. How does tomorrow night at eight sound to you?"

"Sounds like a date."

I heard my devil brother cheering from the kitchen.

In return I put the phone down for a second. "You better be hiding somewhere good you little devil slut, cause we're playing hide-n-seek, cept in this game when I find you I shave a chunk of your hair off!" I heard a loud yelp followed but the pattering of frantic footsteps causing me to smile triumphantly as I put the phone back to my ear.

"That bitch is going to get it."

"Speaking of your brother, he said we'd have three kids and two of them would be ginger but I think two guys with silver hair should have some sort of immunity to the whole thing I mean, come on! Plus, if I'm going push a child out of me, I'm only doing it once. I'm not superman y'know."

I groaned, realizing that sometimes, some things, just don't make sense.

That night when my parents came home, they found my brother with the left side of his hair shaved off and me tied to a tree in a dress.

Suffice to say we had some explaining to do.


	4. Date

Nero and I ended up doing the cliché dinner and a movie. We ate at Chuck-E-Cheese -much to my chagrin- and watched some gushy romance movie (also to my chagrin.)

I guess you could say he and I were total opposites. I was recluse and moody and Nero was cheery and social. We disagreed on a lot of things, our views on the world, our affection for our parents, and our tendencies on optimism and pessimism.

He liked gushy romances and I liked a movie where all the slutty main characters got their heads cut off.

He liked Chuck-E-Cheese and I liked…any place other than Chuck-E-Cheese.

But I guess these are all the reasons I liked him so much.

We were just so...different.

We constantly kept the other guessing, leaving this whole world of possibilities open. It was quite comforting really. I mean, who wants to be in a boring relationship?

And so that was my exact thought as I walked Noah up to his door step, the both of us chattering on like love sick teenagers while constantly holding hands.

"Can you imagine what Brennie would have done if Cassie had died?"

"Change his name to something less gay?" Nero stuck out his tongue.

"Oh don't be that way Mr. Grumpy. You have to admit him taking a bullet for her was so entirely romantic!"

I blanched.

What is with everyone and gushy romance?

"She would have been okay; he didn't need to be all heroic and dramatic."

"Well duh. He knew she wouldn't die. The point is he couldn't stand to see her get hurt."

"Pussy." I muttered as we reached Nero's door.

He rolled his perfectly blue eyes. "Wait here a second." He murmured before rushing inside.

I stared at the door, feeling vague déjà vu.

Five minutes later he came back and slipped a book in my hands. "Here, study it." Then he gave me a quick peck on the cheek before running back inside.

I was left highly confused and blushing profusely. I held up the small book in the moonlight, gaping like a fish.

"A romance novel? Really?"

Every night that week Nero called me on the phone at exactly 8:30 PM and every single time we would discuss how our days went, what we had planned for tomorrow, and then lastly he'd request (more like ordered) me to read a chapter from the romance novel.

Apparently he seriously meant it when he said he wanted me to study.

"Nero, nobody say things like 'my love burns for you with the intensity of a thousand suns.' That's just fucking idiotic ."

"Do you know everybody in the world?"

"What?"

"I said, do you know everybody in the world?"

"Uh…no?"

"Okay then, you can't say that nobody talks like that. You just can't know for sure."

"Touché."

Merely reading the dam book was proving more difficult then I ever thought it would be.

To start off with, the title was Passion Island. Probably also the title for at least fifty pornos. If that wasn't a red flag then I don't know what is.

The next thing in line was the fact that this was about a heterosexual couple. Like I want to hear about some guy saving a damsel in distress while she gets her period all over him. Gag me.

Then of course once I opened the book and actually read the crap inside, I found that the dialogue was worse then literally sticking sewing needles in my eyes.

None of it was realistic either. Oh yes, because the boat just happens to crash on an island in the middle of nowhere and the island just happens to be some sex resort full of nudists and couples seeking ways to spice up their sex life.

Right.

"Would you just read already, you're whining like a six year old."

"Fine, fine. But you owe me."

"We'll see."

I smirked and continued on from whence I left off. "James was glistening under the hot sun, sitting out on the beach nude and unaware of my presence. My heart was fluttering uncontrollably like a butterfly; the pit of my stomach was coiling with heat. I knew I loved him then. I knew we'd spend the rest of our lives together, away from this island. Away from these people. He'd be mine and I'd be his and everyday we'd wake up and watch the sunrise and every night we'd stay up and watch the stars. I'd lie in his arms so nothing could possibly harm me. Love was my protector. I don't need anything else. Just James and his love."

I blanched.

Ew.

"See, wasn't that romantic?"

"She seems a little clingy if you ask me; I mean, watching him while he tans? Fucking stalker."

"You have a lot to learn my young Padawan."

"Stars War nerd!" I teased, laughing lightly.

Talking and being with Nero these past couple weeks have been something…unexplainable. He makes me smile and laugh and see things from a whole different perspective.

In other words: Nero was rubbing off on me.

"Yeah, yeah. Anyways, this Saturday I was thinking we could hang out at the old abandoned building again. That place was actually really peaceful and nice."

"Alright. How does eight sound?" And using my own words, his reply was: "Sounds like a date."


	5. Kiss

Hope you like this kissy mushy googoo scene lol.

* * *

"So what exactly do you want to talk about?"

Nero and I laid side by side on the cold rooftop, looking up at the stars thoughtfully as an awkward silence ensued. I wasn't exactly sure how to kick off the conversation this time around.

"I suppose we should get to know each other right? I mean, I like you and you like me and that's usually what people in our situations do."

"Alright, tell me your life story then."

Nero chuckled. "I'll try. It isn't very interesting though."

"You're too modest."

"Well…I didn't grow having a hard life. My parents made plenty of money, I was an only child, and I got fairly decent grades. Me and my mom are pretty close, we butt heads sometimes sure, but I know she loves me. My dad is away on business a lot. He likes to see things and meet people. That doesn't make him a bad man; actually, I want to be just like him when I grow up. See, I've always had this vision for what I want my life to be. I'm crazy about the environment. 'Saving the world one bottle at a time' as my mom would call it. I want to find more efficient ways for cars to run, I want to find ways to recycle things that nobody ever thought possible, I want to save trees and plants from being destroyed. I'm an idealist I suppose, but my mom says all the great people are. You have to be able to make resolutions and find solutions, ones that nobody else would dare to try. So that's pretty much me in a nutshell. I'm the kid picking up trash on the side of the road and offering a cheery hand when ever it's needed."

The picture fit perfectly in my head. He wasn't just some kid with a fake personality, another walking contradiction. He was real. He cared about things other then himself, he had goals and ideas.

It was like back in grade school when the teachers would ask 'what do you want to be when you grow up' and all the kids would say things like 'Doctors' or 'astronauts' or even 'president of the united states' and nobody would question them because they're just kids, they have their whole lives ahead of them, anything is possible.

That was Nero in a sense. He had his whole life ahead of him, he had goals and he had the drive to accomplish them.

And nobody in my life has ever made me feel more tiny.

"This is usually the part where you tell me your story Virgie. Or are you chicken?"

"Chicken?" I snorted. "There's just not much to tell."

"Well, you must have some goals right?"

I thought about it for a second. All most of my life has been is planning after planning. My parents wanted me to take over their company when I became old enough to do so. The mere thought of being a corporate drone made my skin crawl.

"Well my parents want me to be something I'm not. In other words: I'm not allowed to have goals. It's going again the plan."

I shivered when I felt Nero grab my slightly clammy hand, adding the slightest bit of pressure. "Who cares what your parents want Virgil. You're not a marionette. They can't control you. So I'll ask you again. What are your goals?"

Nero had a point. I'm tired of being controlled.

"Well, when I was in middle school there was this lame contest being held. It was school wide thing, something that only honor students and geeks participated in. The prize was pretty dumb, just some gift certificate to some gay restaurant. But I decided to try it anyways. I knew my friends would make fun of me so I kept it on the down low and handed in my entry discreetly. It was a writing contest and it didn't have much of a prompt besides make it original. So I wrote a short story about a kid not wanting to be stuck in his small town, wanting a way out and dreaming of all the places he could go. Turns out the dumb story was pretty good and I won. My friends gave me grief since it was posted in the office for all to see but it was worth it in the end. It felt good y'know? Having something that I put time and energy into, having something I was proud of. For quite awhile I was convinced I wanted to be a writer. Unfortunately my parents squashed that dream and told me other wise. But in the back of my mind…I still want to be a writer."

Nero stroked my palm and offered a gentle smile. "If you believe you can then you can. Who cares what anybody says, do what makes you happy, not what'll make your parents happy." Nero breathed into the shell of my ear.

Suddenly my stomach burst into a million fluttering butterflies. How…girly.

"Nero," I whispered. "Can I kiss you?" Nero pulled back slightly to look at me, slowly leaning in as my heart sped up. "You're not going to leave this time are you?"

"No." His face was so close to mine that his cool minty breath hit my lips.

Impatiently, I closed the distance between us.

When his lips met mine it was like a million fireworks hitting the sky. Everything in my brain (and the pit of my stomach) was exploding wildly.

At first the kiss was slow and enticing. Our lips were parted slightly as chastised kisses turned into something a bit deeper. Every so often I'd pull back and look at his reaction, only to smirk when he reached into my hair and pulled me back.

Eventually things became more heated, chastised turned into open mouths and when I felt especially daring, I pushed my tongue into his mouth and touched his tentatively.

All in all I'd say we spent a good ten minutes making out.

Surprisingly though, I was the first one to pull back gasping for air. "Wow." I breathed.

"I know." Nero replied just as breathless.

See, my theories on first kisses (not in general. I mean with another person you've never kissed before): if the kiss sucked and you and the other person had no sparks then it will immediately become apparent.

You'll open your eyes after a good ol' make out session and all you'll see is the other person. Just their annoying face. Nothing else.

But, if the kiss was good and the both of you had sparks then everything will be put into perspective. You'll see a potential relationship, potential dates, and maybe even potential love.

So at that very moment I was looking at all the fun and gushiness I'd have with Nero and I knew he was doing the same.

"So…does this make us...boyfriends?" I asked a tab bit too hopeful.

"Are you asking me out?" Nero said with a smirk.

"Yes. I'm asking you out. So is that a yes?"

"I dunno, I kinda only wanted you for your body," He teased. "You are pretty hot and all and you know your brother is expecting us to get to work on making those kids…"

"Nero." I groaned, causing said boy to smile and smack my arm.

"You dope," He pecked my lips. "Of course I'll go out with you."


	6. May

MAY

The month of May kicked off with a series of dates.

It was a good month in my opinion. Nero and I had fallen more and more into each other. We talked on the phone each night and yes, I was still reading chapters from the romance novel.

Unfortunately.

"So Ingrid caught James with another woman and she just…let it go? What. The. Hell. If I was that bitch, I would have kicked the shit out of that sorry mofo."

"Language, Virgie, language. And once again you're missing the entire point: she loved him enough to get over it. She couldn't possibly see herself with anybody else so she learned to love everything about him. Even his flirtatious flaws."

"That isn't a flaw! That's a deal breaker! You can't love someone that doesn't love you back. You need to gain affection just as much as you need to give it. Plain and simple."

"You're wrong. She could still love him with all her heart, even if it was unrequited. Love doesn't need to circulate, it just needs to flow."

"Whatever you say Confucius."

"Would you just read the ending already?"

"Alright. Whatever."

"Go ahead." Nero offered, causing me to stick out my tongue in return (even though he couldn't see it.)

"I lived my life in his lungs, in his every breath of air. His voice carried lullabies that could comfort and sooth me. Every time he kissed me, it was like the first time: gentle and full of love. I didn't think about that other woman. I didn't even dare to think her into existence. All that mattered was me and James. We loved one another and in a crazy messed up world like this one, that was all you could really ask for. The end."

Thank god.

No more mushy romance! Que overly pompous football player victory dance. "Can I please burn this book now? Please?"

"Not until you tell me what you've learned."

"That women are stupid?" I heard an angry 'hey' from down the hall. Stupid nosy mom. She shouldn't bitch; I was going to use her as the main example.

"Virgil! I'm serious! Haven't you learned anything?"

"I'm glad I'm gay?" I offered once more.

"I'm glad you're gay too but that's not what I meant. This is hopeless! You. Are. Unteachable."

"Maybe I have some kid of handicap, like I'm love-retarded."

"It would explain a lot."

"Ouch."

"You know what I mean," Nero sighed. "Lets just go onto the next topic. Are you ever going to tell me where we're going for our date this Saturday?"

"Nero, I already told you, it's a surprise. As in you can't know and I'm not telling you."

"But if you just told me instead of being all secretive then I wouldn't be so dam curious!"

"If it told you, then that would defeat the whole meaning of surprise. Do I need to bring out a dictionary and read you the definition? Maybe you're surprise-retarded…"

Nero snorted. "Touché."

I laughed, wishing he was here next to me. "But don't worry No, you're my retard."

* * *

Don't mean to offend anyone with the word retard. And you guys are going to love what Virgil's demon has to say about Nero in chapter nine.


	7. Date 2

"What should we do first?" Nero crowed.

So, as it turns out, Nero loved my surprise. Actually, he loved the beach in general. I guess I should have expected as much. After all, little kids loved the beach and Nero sure had the spirit of one.

"Dinner first, then the pier."

"Bor-ring." Nero blanched. "We should do the pier first then dinner. Actually, why don't we skip dinner altogether and just go to the pier?"

I had a whole big speech on the tip of my tongue. I had a lecture on how 'I was the one to pick the date' and how 'it was better to eat real food instead of some second rate corn dog probably made from horse meat.'

But of course, Nero had stood up on his tippy toes and kissed me square on the mouth, wrapping his arms around my mid-section and successfully blowing up my train of thought in the process.

"Please?" He whispered into the shell of my ear.

This is sorcery I tell you! Sorcery!

"Low blow Alboeques*."

"Aw, you love it."

And in the back of my mind…I did.

"Fine. We'll go straight to the pier." I surrendered. Once again my dignity has left the building.

So, first me and Nero hit the more daring rides. We went on that dragon type boat that rocks you back in forth until you lose your lunch. Then we hit the rollercoaster, apparently it was Nero's favorite. Secretly it was mine too.

After we conquered those two, we ended up riding the bumper cars, the free fall ride, the submarine ride, and the roller coaster once more.

Once most of the rides were ridden two…or three times we went onto the cliché date stuff.

I was on a mission to win Nero a SpongeBob Squarepants (since I noticed his idolization upon discovering the stuffed animal.) Unfortunately it turns out I'm not very good at carnival type games.

I probably ended up forking over a hundred bucks before Nero insisted it was no big deal; I was just carnival-type-games-retarded he had said.

So with my ego smashed, I attempted to bribe one of the workers to rig the game when Noah wasn't looking.

That day I found out bribing someone to rig a carnival game was illegal. Luckily the security guard near by let me off with a warning.

As my last attempt to redeem myself, I tried one of the trickier games. For five dollars I had three tries to climb up this highly unsteady latter and reach the top.

First try I fell on my ass. Hard.

Second try I got half way and then pummeled miserably.

Third try I got extremely close before falling over at the last second.

By then a whole crowd of people had gathered. Apparently I made weird squeaky noises when I fell. I just don't do well under pressure.

After my three failed attempts, the worker manning the game felt pity on me and decided to give me a fourth try on the house. Upon hearing the news Nero ran up to me, kissed me once again, and whispered 'I believe in you. You can do it. Plus you look sexy when you fall. Even if you scream like a girl.' With that being said, I smiled and attempted my last climb.

The ironic thing is: I made it.

When I reached the top the buzzer went off and I felt on top of the world. At that second the world went into slow motion, all the clapping and cheering sounded delayed and far away. The only voice that stood out was Nero's. I could hear his cheers and 'I knew you could do its' above all else.

I grinned, savoring the moment before promptly falling on my ass once more.

The worker guy handed me a giant SpongeBob SquarePants and I handed said stuffed animal to Nero. He kissed me on the cheek, thanking me for being such a great boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

I don't think I'll ever get used to the flutter in my stomach that ensues upon hear that word.

After operation 'win Nero a SpongeBob' was over, it was well after eight. We ended up eating cotton candy for dinner and decided to hop on the Farris wheel as our last activity.

"So, did you have fun?"

"Well, you sure do know how to treat a boy Virgil Sparda."

"And you sure know how to drive a boy crazy Nero Alboeques."

"You know, I don't think you needed the romance novel after all. I think you're one of those closet romantics that'll never admit they actually like all the gushy stuff but when it comes down to it, they know a thing or two about dating."

"I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered."

"Flattered of course! That's high praise coming from me."

"Oh. Well I should totally be on my knees kissing your feet and thanking you for your praise and admiration great Nero of all knowingness. Thank you for your kind words! Now I can die a happy man!"

"Just doing my job. Now would you just shut up and kiss me? Geeze you're like a regular Simon Cowl, with endless sarcasm upon sarcasm, never-"

And with that, I leaned over the giant SpongeBob between us and shut my boyfriend up with a kiss.

Just as the Farris wheel reached the top.

* * *

So Alboeques mean white knight in Latin


	8. Virgie's temper

Couldn't wait I want your guys opinion on Virgie's demon. I lied I changed some stuff so his demon is going to have his little temper tantrum now. Tell me what you think.

* * *

The following week Nero and I went on three dates, each after he finished his home school work and I finished neglecting mine.

Nero had taken me to an animal shelter he helped out at. Apparently not only did he love the environment, he was also a total animal person.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm dating Nero Alboeques or Mother Teresa.

That day I got the great honor of meeting Buster, a burly old dog that didn't have much of a chance of being adopted.

Nero had wanted to take him home a few times but his mom is apparently allergic and wouldn't allow such a thing.

So, after a quick make out session, I had somehow agreed to asking my folks if I could adopt the old mutt.

My boyfriend is a fiend.

On the next date Nero had dragged me to some theater across town that played old black and white movies.

We ended up seeing breakfast at Tiffany's and I finally found out who Holly Golightly was.

Trish would be proud.

That weekend I accompanied Nero to a place he helped out at. They picked up trash on the side of the road and brainstormed on efficient ways to help keep the earth clean and tidy.

And unlike meeting Buster, I had the unfortunate honor of meeting Wade Wilson. Asshole extraordinaire.

"So you're the one that's been keeping little Tabby here occupied. I've been wondering where he had slid off to."

"Tab…"

"Inside joke Vincent, wouldn't get it even if I told it to you."

"It's Virgil."

"Whatever Vladimir. Hey, did he ever tell you the two of us used to date?"

"Uh, no…" I looked over at Nero, clenching my fists repeatedly.

"Yeah, for like a year. But things got in the way. You know? I couldn't keep up with everything he had to take and I couldn't handle all the serious shit happening. Anyways, he looks good now but who knows how long that'll last."

"Excuse me?" I was five seconds away from round house kicking this fuckers head off.

Wade chuckled.

It made my stomach churn.

Then he made the mistake of putting his hand on my shoulder.

The demon was screaming 'Die! Die! Die! Kill him! Beat him to a blood pulp! How dare he touch our mate! Rip his hand off! Kill him!' but another part of me was screaming 'No! Nero would be upset!'

"You know what I mean dude?"

"No, I don't," I ground out. "But if you don't get your slimy fucking hand off of me in ten seconds, you're going to fucking regret it."

Wade Wilson promptly staggered away from me like I had the plague.

He cursed multiple times before saying 'two months tops and you'll be gone.' Nero of course had ran up to my side asking over and over what happened.

"I can't believe you dated that fucker for a whole year No. He's trash, horribly disgusting trash."

Nero -for whatever reason- started laughing. "A y-ye..." He wheezed and snorted. "Oh god no! We only went on a couple dates and then he tried to have sex with me after like a week and I punched him in the face!"

At that moment I felt my eyes start to glow I wanted to let the demon take over, I really did. I wanted to kick that fuckers ass for even laying a hand on Nero.

But with said boy right in front of me, giggling so cutely and irresistibly, I couldn't help but calm down and laugh along as well.


	9. Nero's mama edited

The following Thursday I had finally met Nero's mom.

Nero and I had planned an over night trip out to Fortuna. We both agreed it'd be nice, plenty of stuff to do and nice weather to boot.

My boyfriend however insisted he probably wouldn't be able to go. I'd come to find that his mother was particularly over protective. So I agreed to talk to her and reassure her Nero was in good hands.

And…not that I'd ever admit it, but…I was immensely nervous.

Mrs. Alboeques had practically skipped into the room, smiling, and singing. She was indeed a sight to behold, long red hair that shined in all the right places with big brown eyes that weren't tainted with eyeliner or other unnecessary things. She was pale like Nero, something he had apparently inherited from her.

All in all she looked more like Nero's older sister then his mother.

"You must be Virgil! I've heard so much about you, you're all he talks about!" She gave me a comforting hug for telling me to have a seat. "Would you like something to drink? We have orange juice, soda, milk, and lemonade."

I smiled at her hospitality. I wish my parents acted the way she did. "No thank you Mrs. Alboeques, I'm fine."

"Oh hun, call me Kyrie."

"Alright Kyrie. I assume Nero told you about the trip?"

"Oh yes, yes, he's been going on about it all this week. And don't get me wrong, I think it's a great idea, I'm just worried. No has a few different medications he has to take and if I'm not around to remind him then it'll be forgotten."

I looked over at Nero, who was looking a bit less cheery then usual. I had seen him take his medication on a few different occasions but he never actually wanted to talk about what they were for. So I usually let the conversation slip but now…now I'm a bit worried.

"Kyrie, what if I reminded him?"

"Well…I suppose that would be okay…I'm trusting you Virgil, keep my boy safe."

"So I can go?" Nero crowed happily.

"Yes…just stay out of trouble."

Nero didn't even get to hear the last part. He had already ran up stairs to pack.

* * *

I decided to try and make the chapters longer


	10. Bath time

We arrived in Fortuna Saturday morning.

The drive was a bit longer then I'd have liked (because traffic sucked) but the weather was nothing less then perfect. Nero was also as happy and cheery as ever and sometimes I think it's contagious.

"Did you see that lobby Virgil, it had flat screen TV's everywhere! I feel like a Rockefeller!"

"Your mom sure did hook us up didn't she?"

"Hell yeah she did!"

"Oh my, did I just hear goody good Nero say the 'H' word? Somebody call the media!"

"Har har. There you go being all Simon Cowl again."

I swayed my hips seductively as we scanned the hallway for our room, purposely acting like a diva. "Oh, you love it."

"Well, I always did think Simon Cowl was pretty sexy…"

"So now you're leaving me for Simon Cowl? Ouch."

"Pretty much. We should draw out the divorce now while we can still stand each other. Who gets what?"

"You can have the ginger kids; I have dibs on the normal one."

"No fair!" I spotted our room, shoving the card key in and sticking out my tongue in the process.

"Alls fair in love and war…" I immediately trailed off upon seeing our magnificent room. The living room housed a big comfy couch, a fully operating kitchen, a beautiful view, and a big screen TV.

Nero squealed.

"Virg! This is friggen awesome! I can't believe my mom paid for all of this! We're only staying one night!"

I started looking around the giant sweet, noticing our bags were already here.

The bedroom was just as luxurious. Though the first thing I noticed was there were two gigantic queen size beds instead of one. Apparently when Nero's mom said 'have fun' she meant the good wholesome kind.

Just as well, contrary to what I tell all the kids back at school, I've never been past third base. And I sure as hell wouldn't push Nero into anything unless he was ready. Sex actually meant something to me. Nero actually meant something to me. These were not things to be toyed with.

"The mini-fridge is fully stocked!" Nero yelled excitedly as I surveyed the bathroom. We had a nice big shower and a giant tub. Interesting.

"Virgil, lets go check out the beach! Come on, I have so much darn energy right now I gotta do something with it!"

Uh…bad thoughts Virgil, bad thoughts.

"Fine." I grunted. "Lets go to the beach."

Upon arriving at said beach ,Nero was hit on by two preppy girls in bikinis. So before he could answer them and give them a polite 'Nero answer', I pushed my boyfriend up against the nearest wall and all but molested him while they watched.

I quickly stuck my tongue in his mouth and smirked into the kiss as we swapped saliva. Once we broke apart, one of the girls (a redhead) started giggling uncontrollably. Her friend (a brunette) had to usher her away once her nose started bleeding.

Fan girls.

Weird.

"You were totally jealous!" Nero accused, causing me to blush like a girl.

"No…no I wasn't! I just don't like bubbly girls like that; they get on my fuckin nerves!"

"Mhm. And you thought kissing me would tick them off royally?"

"I thought they might be…homophobic."

Nice save.

"Right. It's alright Virgie; you can admit you were jealous. I don't mind. It was pretty hot actually."

"Hotter then Simon Cowl?"

"Way hotter then Simon Cowl. I'm just hurt you'd only kiss me like that when potential boyfriend stealing homophobes are around."

I wrapped an arm around his lithe waist, pulling him as close as humanly possible. I leaned in to whisper in his ear.

"I would kiss you like that every second of every day if I could babe. Trust me, you drive me crazy Nero."

"Promise?"

"I swear."

After all the jealous drama was over and done with, we ended up stumbling upon a man handing out flyers for horse back riding.

I leapt at the idea, insisting we had to go. Riding a horse was always something I wanted to do but never got around to taking the initiative.

Now I was with my boyfriend in beautiful Fortuna and the opportunity was being handed to me on a silver platter. It was too good to pass up.

Of course once we reached the ranch, I found out a new foreign fact about Nero: he was afraid of horses.

I know, I couldn't believe it either.

It actually took some coaxing (and agreeing to ride ponies instead of full grown horses) to actually get him to go. After that, the ride was wonderful and all around worth it.

And when all was said and done Nero admitted he was glad he had gone.

Once we arrived back at the hotel, the two of us were laughing acting like a couple of dopes.

"Did you see that guy in the lobby? He looked totally constipated!"

I started laughing uncontrollably. "You're so right! He looked really unhappy, then again I'd be too if I had a gold digging trophy wife like that bleach blond bitch next to him."

"Seriously. She looked like a Barbie doll."

I nodded with a short laugh, picking through my suitcase for a small shampoo and conditioner bottle. "I think I'm gonna take a hot bath No, my legs are a little sore. I feel like an old man."

I grabbed a fluffy robe so fast that I almost missed the expression on Nero's delicate face as he followed me into the bathroom.

I turned on the bath while looking over at him curiously. "Something wrong?" Immediately my boyfriend's face turned bright red.

"Uh…" His blush only increased as I continued to search his expression for answers. "Well, I was thinking…"

"Yeah?" I questioned, while turning off the water and pulling my shirt off.

"Maybe…we could like…you know…take a bath…together."

Instantly I froze. My brain had gone into titanic mode and I was trying desperately to avoid the ice burg but the wheels weren't turning fast enough.

"I don't want to like…do it or anything. Just a platonic bath. I thought it might be a bit romantic…" Nero slipped his shirt over his head, stilling blushing profoundly. "If you don't want to then that's fine I suppose…"

And that's when my brain burst back into motion.

"No! No, it's okay, I do…it's just unexpected that's all."

With shaky hands I started undoing my belt as Nero did the same.

The whole thing was quite an awkward affair. Once Nero's boxers were gone I didn't know whether I should look or look away.

I mean, it's creepy to stare right? But then again, he is my boyfriend and I think that gives me staring rights. Wait, is he expecting me to stare? What if he thinks I'm insulting him by blatantly looking anywhere but his nether regions? Or what if I look and he's insulted because he'll think that I'm a pervert that's only after sex? He did say this bath was purely platonic right? But what if...

"Relax." Nero whispered. "You look like you're going to blow a gasket."

I took a deep breath before stepping into the tub, sighing as the hot water hit my body. Nero did the same, sliding into a spot against my chest.

"Wash my hair for me." He whispered.

I obeyed of course, drizzling a little shampoo into my hands and rubbing it into his scalp gently. It was silent for awhile. I continued to shampoo and condition his hair, even though the awkward silence was highly uncomfortable.

Once those two actions were finished, Nero finally decided to speak again.

"Virgil?" He whispered as I ran my fingers through his silky hair. I 'hmmed' in response.

"If there was something…wrong with me, hypothetically, what would you do?"

I twirled a random lock of hair through my long fingers, raising an eyebrow quizzically. "Depends on what's wrong I suppose."

"Well…something that just wasn't right. Something serious that would put me in the hospital for awhile."

"I'd come and visit you every single day."

"What if…what if I was a horrible sight to look at?"

"Unless you grew boobs and a vagina, that could never happen. Never."

"I'm serious."

"So am I. Do you own a mirror? You're gorgeous babe, nothing could deter that."

"Sexier then Simon Cowl?" He questioned with an angelic smile.

I leaned down and kissed the tip of his nose.

"That old man has nothing on you."

That night Nero crept into my bed, snuggling with me as close as humanly possible. I wrapped my arms around his small waist and buried my head in his hair.

My last thought before drifting into a deep peaceful sleep was: I think I'm falling for this boy.


	11. JUNE

JUNE

The month of June was pretty uneventful. Nero and I didn't get to hang out much, he said his dad was back in town and that meant all his time had to go elsewhere.

I took every opportunity we got, talking on the phone, texting, and IMing.

My parents had started questioning why I was attached to the phone all the time and I all but told them to mind their own fucking business. Nero didn't really understand my actions; I'd go as far as to say he was insulted. I tried explaining to him that my parents were tricky; they had a way of ruining things. Nero was just too important to me. I wasn't about to throw him to the sharks.

He of course called me a drama queen and said I liked to make people out to be worse then they really were. I didn't actually begin to convince him until the only eventful thing to happen that entire month: we went on a double date with Dante.

Yeah, it's sounds like some parallel universe to me too.

Apparently he had started dating some guy named Credo. He was a fairly quiet kid, pretty polite and definitely the total opposite of my sister. Upon hearing the news Nero had insisted that we all do a double date since he had a Saturday free. I did everything in my power to deter his crazy ideas but Nero was as stubborn as a mule.

Finally after thirty thousand pleas from both Nero and Dante (who had been listening to my phone conversation) I finally, regrettably, agreed. Of course the two of them had been ecstatic (Dante even referred to Nero as his 'brother in law') but I was left dreading the weekend to come.

Though, as it turns out, the date wasn't as horrible as I thought it to be.

Nero and Dante had a jolly ol' good time cracking jokes and making marital plans at my expense but surprisingly enough Credo and I bonded in a sense.

Turns out we both hate romance novels.

Go figure.

So the both of us chattered on and on about how our partners were disgusting romantics and how the gushy stuff made our stomachs turn. I even considered doing the cliché older brother thing and say if he were to hurt Dante I'd cause him bodily harm but I figured my brother already made that threat.

The boy did look a bit too nervous for his own good after all.

So all in all everything went fairly well. Dante convinced Nero that he did not want to meet our parents and I had walked off hoping that Dante didn't rip Credo's nuts off in the future.

Yep, June was a pretty neutral month.


	12. JULY

JULY

It was the first week of July, July fourth as it turns out, when Nero turned to me and said: "I want to have sex."

I first reaction was: "Very funny. Did you take pepdo pismo with your medication again?"

Nero rolled over onto the other side of the bed, pouting like a child. It was one of those rare days when his mom was away on business, doing whatever lawyers did. So I took it upon myself to keep my boyfriend company while she was gone.

But never in a million years would I have expected that sentence to roll out of his mouth.

"A simple 'no' would have been fine. No need to make me feel stupid."

Immediately I sat up, staring down at him in shock.

"Wait…you're serious?" Nero rolled his eyes, still pouting quite intently.

"Don't act so repulsed. I'm not that ugly."

"Ug…ly…Nero! Don't say things like that! That's not what I meant! I'm just surprised. Where exactly is this coming from?"

He shrugged. "I just want to have sex. There was no further thinking involve, in fact, I'm pretty much acting on an impulse."

"An impulse." I deadpanned.

"Yeah, an impulse, now would you just drop the subject? I don't even care anymore."

Nero turned away from me completely. I spluttered a couple times, trying to grasp a hold of the situation at hand. Suddenly my hormones were screaming at me to fix the situation. "Alright," I whispered. "Lets have sex."

In turn he merely grunted.

"Really. Let's do it."

"You don't sound like you want to."

"I do! Oh god I do. Just cut me a break, I've never…done this before. Christ, I'm not even exactly sure how it works…"

Nero rolled over upon hearing those words. "So…you're a virgin then?"

"No, I'm a whore that's slept with tons of dirty old fat guys. Of course I'm a virgin Ner, have a little faith in me."

"Sorry." He whispered

"Are you…?"

"Duh." I smiled.

"Then we'll figure it out together. That is…if you still want to try."

Nero merely answered me with a hungry kiss.

And of course after everything was said and done: I wasn't a virgin anymore.

* * *

I will make Le sexy chapter is you say I should but I'm not good at le sexy chapters


	13. I'm so sorry

The week following the loss of my virginity (may it rest in peace) I didn't hear from Nero at all.

Nothing.

Zip.

Zero.

Nada.

He wouldn't answer his phone; I ended up leaving him probably fifty voice mails.

He wouldn't reply to my texts or IM's, I probably sent him a hundred each.

And when I finally became desperate enough to go to his house and ring his door bell, not a single soul was home. News papers were piled up at their doorstop, the grass in the front yard was uncut and unruly, and there were no cars in the drive way.

Something in the pit of my stomach started coiling; I had this horrible, horrible feeling. Something wasn't right. Something definitely wasn't right.

Was it just a coincidence that right after Nero and I had had sex that he and his mom had dropped off the face of the earth?

Maybe he was ashamed of me, of what he did. Maybe they're staying at a hotel somewhere, doing all they can to avoid my very presence.

Either way, my demon went on a frenzy of self pity and self hatred while I was about ready to sit in my car and cry my eyes out like a girl when I suddenly got a text from an unknown number.

Virgil, go to Holy Cross Hospital NOW.

I suppose I should feel stupid that I was taking order from a cell phone but something in my gut told me Nero would be there. So I set my navigational system and just like the cell phone, I obeyed orders.

Once I pulled into the parking lot, I nearly ran a few people over to get the first available parking space. And once I hopped out of the car I nearly ran a few people over as well.

I ran up to the snooty front desk lady, smacking her bubble gum again and again and tapping her ridiculously long acrylics nails against her desk.

"How may I help you?" She asked in a bored monotone voice.

"I need to see Nero Alboeques."

She smacked her bubble gum once more while looking through a couple charts. "Fifth floor cancer ward."

"Can…can…c-cancer? That has to be some mistake. Are you sure you have the right person?"

"Only Nero Alboeques here." I wanted to rip each of her fake nails out as she continued to tap, tap, tap. I have seen the devil and devil is this receptionist.

"Thank you." I somehow gritted out before calmly waltzing towards the elevator.

This had to be some kind of practical joke. I bet once I reach the fifth floor Nero is going to jump out smiling while explaining that among all the trash picking up and animals he helped, he also volunteered at a hospital.

Yeah, that was definitely Nero.

"I got you so good Virgil! I bet you actually thought I was sick! I'm sorry, didn't mean to give you a heart attack. I just wanted to see your face. But don't worry, look, I'm fine. Please stop giving me that morbid pouty face, how bout we kiss and make up?"

Except…when I walked into the room…there he was, just lying there, hooked up to IV's and other technical equipment.

He was looking up at me with shock and I was looking down at him with confusion. Please god, let this be some kid of sick nightmare…

"Nero?" I whispered, approaching his bed slowly.

"Virgil? H-How did you know I was here?"

"Somebody sent me a text…"

Nero grunted. "My mother. Nosy woman." Somehow I was in too much shock to except pleasant banter.

"W-Wha….Wha…What the hell is going on?"

My boyfriend sighed. His face looked aged somehow. He was more pale then usual, not to mention he had heavy bags under his eyes and he looked skinnier then ever. "I…I have Leukemia."

The word didn't register correctly. It had to be processed in bits and pieces before I could fully comprehend the meaning.

"Lu…Leukemia! How…when...?"

"I was diagnosed a few years ago and I've been fighting ever since."

"N-No… you were fine! You were fine! I saw you!"

"I was in remission and I was doing quite well actually, the doctors thought I was actually making progress."

"Why didn't you fucking tell me? I'm your bloody boyfriend for godsakes, I think I have the fucking right to know don't-cha think?"

"Would you not curse in here? There are little kids around."

"I will fucking curse when I fucking want! Fuck you! This is fucking ridiculous!There are a few things you should bring up on a first date: I'm a Christian, I love the Beatles, oh, and I'm fucking dying."

"No I'm not!" Nero hissed. "Take that back! I'm not! I'm still here aren't I? Cancer is word, not a sentence. And I can tell you whatever I darn well please! It's my life."

I threw my fucking hands in the air like I was at a bloody rock concert.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought after last week it was our life. My bad. Apparently I don't mean a goddam bit to you."

"Look," Nero hissed. "I'm sorry, I really liked you and I panicked. I panicked because I didn't want your pity, I panicked because I had tried so dam hard to keep up this intricate façade of some cheery optimistic kid that didn't have a care in the world when on the inside I just wanted to run and hide. I'm sorry. I just…didn't know what else to do."

I looked over at the boy I loved, yes loved, and knelt down next to his bed. "Nero, I would have protected you! I would have done everything in my power to make you feel safe. You don't give me enough credit sometimes."

"I know and I'm sorry. I just…panicked."

I leant over and kissed his forehead gently. "Well you don't have to panic anymore cause I'm here to stay kid. Remember on our first date when we saw that mushy movie where the guy took the bullet for that girl and you told me he did it because he couldn't bare to see her hurting? Well this me taking a bullet for you. I can't bare to see you hurting. And Even if you don't want me around, I'm staying You're stuck with me. "

"What a punishment."

I snorted and kissed his forehead once more. "One question though before your mom pops in at the worst possible moment: What would you say if I said I was falling in love with you Nero Alboeques?"

"I-I'd say I was falling in love with you too Virgil Sparda."

* * *

I'm so sorry -crys all the manly tears-


	14. Short

Each day that week I got into a particular routine.

I'd wake up at six AM, eat a bowl of oatmeal, pick up a trashy magazine and a apple, visit Nero (and read him said trashy magazine) until I was kicked out, chat with his mom for a half an hour, and then go home and google as much about leukemia as possible.

Nero and I had a lot of time now for just talking and being in new found love.

He'd tell me plot ideas for the future novels I'd write -all of which were gushy romances- and I'd tell him my amateur ideas for keeping the earth clean.

And Nero, being Nero, always smiled at my effort.

As time went on, we'd play card games and tons of board games like Monopoly, candy land, and LIFE. I never missed how Nero would always pair up two blue people instead the traditional blue and pink.

Secretly, I hoped it was us.

After the first week I started to get used to the hospital and it in turn started to get used to me.

There were two people I learned to avoid at all costs: Bitchy bubble gum chewing secretary (other wise know as Agie) who Nero and I had been brainstorming on different ways to get her fired and bitchy old nurse (other wise known as nurse –stick-up-her-ass.) The name said it all, she was bitchy and old. Probably going through menopause.

One day though, the fun times had dimmed. I over heard the doctor talking to Kyrie. Apparently they thought Nero was doing much better but as it turns out he was doing much worse.

(Oh the irony.)

Chemotherapy was set to start soon.


	15. Hair

The first time I walked in on Nero crying, it was a hot Friday morning. I had spent the night before laying awake, thinking of said boy, thinking of all the things the future would bring.

Initially my reaction was confusion and shock and his was anger, something I had yet to really become familiar with. This side of Nero was almost…foreign to me. I wasn't sure what to say or how to act. I was more or less a chicken running around with it's head cut off.

"Babe," I choked out, racking my brain. "What's wrong?" It's as good a place to start as any.

"Go away! I don't want to see you right now! Just…go away!" He screamed eyes glowing red his arm had changed into a devil arm. Faintly I saw the blue aura of his devil side.

Whoa.

Note to self, an angry Nero is a scary Nero.

Slowly I approached his bed with caution while my mind went into a total frenzy. Maybe he had finally realized how much better he can do. Maybe he's only been with me this whole time because he felt bad for me. Me, the little whiny rebel that's never happy with anything.

Fuck.

"Did…did I do something wrong?" My heart started racing and my vision became slightly unfocused.

See, you never know how much you love something until it's falling out of your grasp. One day Tiger is just your annoying cat that scratches all of your furniture and the next he's dying and suddenly he's the best pet in the world.

(maybe not such a good analogy.)

Point is, love's a funny thing I suppose, really puts things into perspective.

"Of course not…on second thought yes, you did something wrong, now leave because I'm really, really mad at you!"

That's when I saw it.

Nero scratched under his nose.

"You're lying."

"No I'm not!" He protested, voice shaking slightly.

"I'm not lying; I don't want to see your ugly face. Now leave before I call the nurses!"

I began approaching him once again, unsure as to what was going on but knowing I wasn't to blame. "You scratch your nose when you lie, it gives you away." I stated simply. "So please, tell me what's wrong. Remember what I said before? I don't want to see you hurting Nero. Please."

I kneeled down in front of Nero's bed, taking his hand gently, trying to convey an air of comfort. He tried to jerk away but I held on tight, letting him know I wasn't going anywhere, anytime soon. "Please." I whispered once again.

Nero's face clenched together, visibly trying to hold back tears and failing miserably. "I…"

I reached up and wiped his face as a few hot tears fell down torturously slow.

"I don't want you to see me like this!" He hissed. "My hairs started falling out; within a week it'll all be gone. I'll be ugly Virgil; I'll be this little frail prune, wasting away into nothing. I don't want you coming in here every morning and kissing something that makes your stomach churn just because you think it's your duty! Just like you say to me, I couldn't take it knowing it'd be hurting you. I….I." Nero started sobbing into my arm as I sat there shocked.

I'd always held Nero up on this glorious level where he had over flowing self esteem and never ending optimism. Never in a million years would I have guessed he thought of himself like…this.

Christ, how does he not see how fuckin wonderful he is? How can he sit here and say all these highly untrue things about himself? He's beautiful! Everything about him is beautiful, and not just his looks either, its his personality, his goals, his love for then environment. Everything about him just shined. And if he can't see that I love him for all those reason then…I'll just have to show him!

So I simply got up and walked out of the room.

Maybe it wasn't exactly the smartest thing to do. Lord knows that a million horrid things were probably going through poor Nero's mind at the moment but what I was going to do had to be done now. I couldn't let him sit and dwell any further on his hatred for his appearance. I said I was going to protect him and that's what I'm going to do.

I hurriedly ran down the five flights of stairs (in retrospect it probably would have been easier to have taken the elevator) bursting through the door and sprinting towards the gift shop.

Hospitals were funny places to buy gifts at. For one thing the only things they carried were slightly insulting 'get well' cards and giant gushy teddy bears.

The rest of the store was filled with highly unhealthy snack foods (yes, I see the irony), aspirins, and little mini vacation items. You know, the little tooth pastes and shavers and other various miniature things you pack with you in your suit case.

I quickly bought a pack of razors and a small bottle of shaving cream. Then I ran into the bathroom and did the craziest thing I've ever done in my life.

I shaved my head.

It was a quick affair, barely even had enough time to say good bye to my hair as it was dumped in the trash can.

I suppose I looked odd bald, my head was whiter and lumpier then expected but at least I didn't look like homer Simpson. I figured it'd grow back eventually and there's really no use in crying over something as superficial as hair.

With that being said (or thought) I ran into the elevator (because I'm thinking clearer this time around) grinning.

So, maybe this was reckless and impulsive but hey, that's what life's all about right?

Once the elevator opened, I started sprinting to Nero room, bursting in like the place was on fire. Nero in turn looked up, face red and tears stained.

"Baby, I fuckin love you. I know you hate it when I curse but there is just no other way for me to explain it. I don't care what you'll look like, you'll still be beautiful to me, everything single fuckin day of my life. The only thing that hurts is that you didn't have faith in me. I love you. That should mean something. That should mean everything. I wouldn't leave you over something as entirely dumb as your hair falling out! That's ridiculous. Now, you need to stop thinking those crazy unbelievable things or I'll have nurse stick-up-her-ass come in here and talk some sense into you!"

Nero looked up at me; eyes blood shot and pupils wide from whatever they've put into him. His face was that of a shocked animal. Maybe he didn't know what to say. Maybe he didn't believe me. Either way the kid started crying again, holding his arms out and reaching for me with all he was worth.

I swiftly crossed the room, fighting the urge to jump into his arms like some cheesy romance novel. Like Passion Island.

"I love you." Nero whispered, kissing my bald head. "I love you, I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. Please. I…I love you."

"I know you do No, you never, ever have to convince me. I believe you. Just do the same for me babe, trust me, and believe me when I say I love you. I'm not the type of person to throw those three words around."

He continued to kiss my head and neck vigorously, constantly whispering 'okays' and 'I love you's.'

So maybe me and Nero weren't so different after all. Pretty much every day I spent looking at him as some unbreakable optimist that never lost hope or sight of the situation and he probably looked at me as vise versa.

Yet we've shown each other that maybe a single word couldn't really define who we are. We're deep and complex; we're human beings with layers upon layers of emotions and personality traits. We break and we smile. We break and we cry.

The point is, we do it together.

A couple hours later I was lying beside Nero in his hospital bed, trying to change the mood.

"I make a pretty sexy bald person huh?"

Nero smiled before promptly smacking me in the arm.


	16. August

AUGUST

For the rest of July Nero and I had kept up with our little routine and once August hit, our relationship had become stronger and stronger but Nero's health had become weaker and weaker.

The treatment didn't seem to be working as well as before and doctor Brentson had told Nero, me, and his mom that they'd have to up the dosages and radiation.

Which meant less visiting hours for me.

Well, the doctors should know me by now, I'm not a force to reckoned with.

So every night after lights out I'd hide under Nero's bed until the doctors were out of sight and I'd crawl in next to him.

The nights were the worst for the both of us.

Sometimes I'd hold him close, silently crying and praying he'd be alright. Nero would do the same, whispering how much he loved me and how much he was grateful for my presence.

Nero always had a way of soothing my fears. One gentle touch of this finger tips against my cheek and I was sold.

I suppose that's how you know you're in love.

Most people crave affection, attention.

They need lots of sex and physical contact to feel satisfied.

I on the other hand didn't need much from Nero, just a gentle touch here and there and an exchange of 'I love yous' and that was that. Knowing he loved me was enough, I didn't need anything else.

And so the long peaceful nights were when I started to actually understand Passion Island.

It made sense now, when Ingrid said all she needed to survive was James's love. That was me now. I was Ingrid. Funny realization I suppose, realizing you had more in common with girls then you thought. It wasn't too horrible of an epiphany though, considering I knew Nero was nothing like James. He didn't hit on other guys or flirt shamefully in my presence. He loved me and I loved him in return.

I was taking the bullet for him. I wouldn't let him hurt. Even when he looked at me with red, dilated eyes. Even when his arms started to splotch with little bruises. Even when he was throwing up and I was rubbing his back soothingly.

Even when seeing him in pain was causing me to feel the same.

It was the third week of August when I finally broke.

Nero had been out for most of the day and the part that he was awake for; he was crying and puking up blood.

I stayed with him until the doctors came in and shoved me out.

Nero looked up at me pleadingly, like he was saying 'help me Virgil, for the love of god, help me' and I had no idea what to do. I'd never felt this way before, but at that very moment, I felt like…a kid. A eighteen year old kid that had no idea what he was doing and was in way over his head. I couldn't take care of myself let alone Nero.

But I'm trying so, so dam hard. I'm trying because I love him. I'm trying because I know he needs me. He needs me to be strong even when I'm screaming on the inside.

So it came as no surprise that by the time I got home I was sobbing like there was no tomorrow.

I had been letting everything build and build until it was all smashed in to one giant nuclear bomb that was ready to explode.

My first primary emotion was rage. I was mad at god for a bit, letting my demon break things, while I was cursing the omnipresent being for making Nero sick.

Then I was angry at cancer. I thought the entire disease was stupid, uncalled for, cruel. Why couldn't it go away and just drop out of existence?

I just…didn't understand.

So to help me self understand, I threw couple ordainments at the wall.

Which of course made me think of Christmas and god, so I was back to being mad at him again.

"Are you happy god?" Another ordainment was pulverized. "You got what you fuckin wanted! I'm suffering and you're laughing. I'm a homo and I'm already in my own personal hell!" I aimed a couple at my lamp and ended up doing a double whammy.

"Fine. Fuckin ruin my life. It's what you're good at right?" I decided I didn't like my window very much and that went bye bye as well. "Whatever. My life was going to shit anyways. Might as well take away the one good fuckin thing to ever happen to me, right?"

Funny how I expected him to answer.

I broke my mother's favorite vase next (why it was in my room I do not know.) Then I started yelling and thrashing anything in my sight. After the initial rage, I descended into a state of being pissed off and really upset. I was sobbing once again, unable to control my self.

By then, Dante had come home and found my pathetic state. I half expected him to laugh and call me all kinds of names, but to my utmost surprise, he sat down on my bed and wrapped his arms around my shaking frame.

I suppose in the bleakest of times, you can always count on your family (or what's left of it.)

I didn't even have give him any explanation, he just…knew.

So I continued to sob into his shoulder, grateful for every time he shushed me like a mother and cooed my name soothingly.

Two days later I suddenly felt very angry all over again. I then proceeded to look up a specific person online and successfully found his address.

The second Wade Wilson opened his door; I let my demon out and punched him square in the face.

It made me feel much, much better.


	17. Dance

The weeks following my breakdown were particularly hard.

Nero had become increasingly worse in a short period of time. He rarely ate anything and he slept half the time I was here. I'd just hold his hand reassuringly and read Passion Island out loud as he slept.

Sometimes Kyrie would listen and smile and tell me Nero was lucky to have somebody like me. Mentally I'd correct her and say I was lucky to have somebody like him.

The times that Nero was awake I'd read him a couple stories I had been working on. He'd smile and clap and say I would be a wonderful author one day.

And so it was, just because Nero declared it to be.

Then one day I came across a flyer announcing that the hospital was throwing a dance for all the long term teenage patients. I had jumped at the idea of course and after a bit of coaxing on my part, I had convinced both Kyrie and Doctor Brentson that it'd be a good idea.

Nero was let out of the hospital for a day (a pass not easily received) but he still had to have few portable equipment with him to ensure his safety.

We ended up going to a shopping center, on a hunt for finding the perfect tux. Nero insisted we did anything but simple black, he said it'd be much more 'fun.' I merely rolled my eyes and continued on.

Eventually we ended up at some store where the shop keeper kept eyeing Nero like he was contagious and I had to hold myself back from kicking his ass.

Somehow I ended up buying a blue suit.

Yes, blue.

Nero and his sorcery suppose.

Nero in turn bought a white one that -despite the color- looked amazing on him.

Then, after the shopping was over, with we ended up stumbling into a store that sold wigs. Nero insisted that he didn't want me forking over three hundred dollars for something so superficial but immediately I had noticed him idolizing one in particular.

It reminded me of the hair he used to have, snow white, shiny, slightly long. I can see the similarities and why he had been drawn to it so fast. So I made him try it on and he couldn't mask how much he loved it.

I ended up buying it for him after he insisted on buying one for me. In my opinion that day was a good day, its felt like old times again.

On the day of the dance I had arrived right as the clock ticked over to five o' clock. Nero was there of course, looking so much like an angel that my breathing had stopped for a second.

"You look…"

Magnificent?

Stunning?

Godly?

"…beautiful."

Maybe not the most appropriate thing to say, considering his lack of vagina…but…no other word seemed to fit.

Nero merely snorted of course. "A. you don't look so bad yourself stud and B. I thought we already established you were the girl in this relationship?"

"You established it. I never agreed to such blasphemy."

"Too bad you don't have a choice."

Nero puckered his lips playfully and I decided to take that moment to lean down and capture them.

"Shall we go me lady?" Nero rolled his eyes.

"We shall."

The dance, as it turns out, was more depressing then watching daytime television.

I recognized most of these kids from the cancer ward, all looking every bit as pale and ghastly as Nero. Worst was, they danced like living corpses. Each couple moving slower then the last, with expressions saying they didn't want to be here at all.

Nero was the only lively one of the bunch, scooping up his optimistic outlook and pulling me onto the dance floor. The kid had more energy then me.

How…ironic.

"One dance and we're out of this joint. These kids look like zombies."

"Where exactly are we running off to, if you don't mind me asking?"

I dipped Nero gently before pulling him back up to my chest again. "It's a surprise. If I told you that would defeat the purpose, remember? For now…lets just play a little game."

"Checkers?"

"Close. I'll tell you all the things I love about you and you do the same with me. Sound fun?"

"Loads. Aside from the fact that this is just another way for you to act conceited."

"Oh shut up. Stop being a poor sport. Look, I'll go first."

"Alright, don't forget to mention how devilishly handsome I am."

Nero snorted. "I love…the way you're not afraid to be yourself around me. I love how you tease me and you don't handle me as some fragile person that's about to break any second. I love how much you pretend to hate gushy romance when really...you secretly love it. I love that you love the Beatles. I love that you always know what to say to make me feel better. I love that you curse because deep down I think it's hot. I love that you love horses and beaches and that you get jealous because it's cute. I Love…I really love the way you say my name when you get turned on. And most of all…I love how you make everything in my messed up world seem brighter just with a simple smile."

I really didn't have words to comprehend how much I loved Nero at that moment. The first thing I wanted to do was kiss the breath out of him.

Unfortunately though, the song had finished and Nero was dragging off the dance floor and out of the room.

"Is it my turn now?" I questioned breathlessly as we ran down foreign hallways and up endless stairs.

"Yes."

"Well, I love pretty much everything about you Nero Alboeques. I love the composure you keep even when everything seems bleak and dark. I love your eyes; I think I could spend hours just getting lost in them. I love your love for the environment and animals and everything else you lend a helping hand to. I love your optimism. I love your giggly laugh. I love how much you love romance novels and other gushy stuff, even if I'd never admit it. I love how you always know what to say. And most of all...I love how you make everything in my messed up world seem brighter just with a simple smile."

Nero's words had said it best. His smile was better then any medicine out there.

The both of us burst onto the twelfth floor to find it was completely deserted and the only light source was the moon shining through each window, causing the entire hall to be bathed in silver.

The sounds of thunder and rain outside only added to the illusion.

"They're remodeling," Nero whispered as he picked a random room. "Everything's done but the painting and it's a Saturday so no one's around. We have the whole place to ourselves…" My boyfriend pushed me onto the nearest bed, slowly crawling on top of me soon after. "Any suggestions as to how we should spend our new found privacy?"

"I can think of a few things."


	18. The moment after and Heaven

"Virgil?" Nero whispered.

"Hm?"

"Where do you think we go when we die?" I looked up at the dark ceiling as the sounds pitter pattering from the rain could be heard all around us.

The air in the room smelled clean and refreshing, sending Goosebumps all over our naked skin as I hugged Nero closer to my chest.

"What kind of question is that?" I asked partly irritated. I didn't want to ruin the mood by talking about something as stupid (and inevitable) as death.

"A valid one."

"Well my opinion doesn't exactly count, me and the big guy up stairs haven't really been on speaking terms since I was a little runt."

"I'm not asking you to feed me some media scam about big fluffy white clouds and angel wings, I'm asking for your honest opinion."

My right arm unconsciously drew lazy circles on Nero's pale bruised back.

I considered his question for a moment.

I guess we all had a different vision for what heaven would be like. Some guys would say a place with never ending booze and hot chicks or something stupid like all the food you can eat. I may have been ones of those guys once (minus the hot chicks part) but now…now Nero has made me into the guy that I was always meant to be.

"I think after you die…you go to this happy place within your self. Like your dreaming but…everything is real and you can never be unhappy. I think it's different for everyone though because we all have a different definitions of happiness."

Nero smiled goofily, scrunching his face together and giving me a peck on the lips.

"My happy place, my heaven," He whispered. "Would be in a big blue house in sunny California with a white picket fence. The house would be so close to the sea that you could smell it all around you like an intoxicating cologne that'd never go away. Kids would be laughing and playing down the block and everybody would be happy. And you'd be there of course and I'd still be comparing you to Simon Cowl every morning and you'd still be a closet romantic. We'd be happy together, every hour of every day of every week. You'd help me plant a few lemon trees in the front yard because I used to have one when I was a kid and every day we'd make fresh lemonade and share it with the neighbors and everything would be wonderful. Everything would be perfect. You wanna know why?"

"Why?" I croaked.

"Because in my heaven the word 'cancer' wouldn't exist. It'd be nothing. Gone."

I kissed his forehead just as a roll of thunder could be heard outside.

I could picture it now, the story Nero had told, not just as a fantasy world but as a future. I could see the beautiful house by the sea. I could see our lives together, me waking up everyday next Nero, loving him even more then the day before. Him writing little notes of 'I love yous' and 'thanks yous.' He'd be off saving the world by making everything eco-friendly and I'd stay home to write novels and take care of the eventual adoptive kids. I could see us having two girls and a boy, each one of them getting into trouble and becoming a handful.

I'd be the strict but loveable one and Nero would be the lenient fun one. We'd work well as a family, always bickering but ultimately loving each other despite all the cracks and flaws.

We'd tell our kids that anything was possible, that anything could be accomplished and we'd be the first parents to love their kids for who they are and not despise them for what they aren't.

So they'd grow up and do things most kids never had the nerve to do, invent things, become novelists or artists, start families and be happy.

Then me and Nero would all the while watch and smile and grow old together and everything would be fantastic because he'd be by my side.

I smiled, blinking back girly tears.

"Virgil?" Nero whispered once more.

"Yeah?" I squeaked.

"Whats your definition of heaven?"

I didn't even have to think about it. The answer was painfully clear.

"Any place where you're at. That's my definition of heaven."

And never has there been truer words.

* * *

Is it bad that I was crying while writing this?


	19. SEPTEMBER

SEPTEMBER

The month of September was by far the worst month of them all.

The weeks following the dance were more horrible then the last. Nero started fading, deteriorating, right before all of our eyes. He was slowly but surely wasting away into nothing. His face was covered in black splotches and his eyes looked sickeningly drawn out and clouded. Nero didn't eat much either, he was constantly puking and coughing up blood.

The doctors had said that he simply wasn't excepting the treatment anymore, that his body was just too worn out. I'd stay by his side everyday of course, occasionally Dante and Credo would be next to me as well and I'd continue to read Passion Island over and over.

I think Nero appreciated it, even if he was asleep ninety percent of the time. Occasionally he'd twitch and mutter my name which I took as a sign of gratitude.

On the second week of September I finally got the chance to meet Nero's family, including his infamous father.

On any other occasion I would have been ecstatic but something in my gut was screaming that this whole situation was…wrong.

See, Nero had once told me that his family just didn't get along with each other. They were the type that only came together during holidays and disasters.

His mom's family bickered constantly and his dad's family was quiet and distant.

A part of me kept whispering: today is not a holiday.

"You must be the infamous Virgil." A large burly woman stood in front of me, she looked like the strong type, a woman that could take a blow to the face and give one in return. I merely nodded in response and offered a sad smile. "I'm Nero's aunt Shelly. I've heard an awful lot about you, you're all my nephew talks about. Virgil this, Virgil that, couldn't get the kid to tell me a single thing about himself."

"Tell me about it," A woman with red hair chimed in. "He talks about his boyfriend like he's some kind of god."

"Must be good in the sack." Yet another woman added.

"Uh…"

So, this was me being thrown to the sharks…

Ouch.

"Would you ladies please stop talking about my son's sex while he, and I, are still present in the room?" Kyrie said a bit disgruntled

"I hope I didn't just hear you're talking about Nero's sex life… really, do you three not have any manners, or at least something better to do?"

And there he was.

Mr. Alboeques.

I could tell immediately by his faded sliver hair and vibrant blue eyes.

He was clad in a business suit and dress shoes, not that I expected anything different.

He was also quite a bit taller then me and certainly much more buff, I'd even go as far as to say this guy could probably kill me and make it look like an accident. "You must be Virgil."

I didn't know whether to say yes or ask if that was a bad thing.

"Yes…sir." That'll do.

Mr. Alboeques let a wide grin spread across his burly face. "I've heard so much about you."

"We all have." The redhead chimed.

"Melissa, you're ruining my first impression moment. Can't you be quiet for three seconds?"

The redhead, Melissa, 'humphed' and slump back in her chair.

"Anyways, it's really nice to meet you. I wasn't sure what exactly I was walking into and I must apologize if I sound a bit ignorant."

"It's alright sir, I'm used to trying to break free from stereotypes and what not."

Everyone expected me to float around and talk all girly and be ultra feminine but I just…wasn't. I was the total opposite actually.

"I can't even imagine… It must be hard sometimes, I know Nero had a hard time at first. Poor kid was convinced me and Kyrie would disown him. I wish he would have a little more faith in us. We're his parents."

"I know right! Sometimes he's always so quick to think I'll take the easy way out…I'm just not like that."

Mr. Alboeques grinned once more, reaching out and shaking my hand properly. "That's quite a handshake you got there boy. I think Nero's lucky to have you."

I smiled. "No sir, I'm lucky to have him."

At that moment Nero finally woke up, laughing and joking that he knew we were talking about him.

We ended up ordering pizza and playing the game of LIFE. Again I didn't miss the fact that Nero had paired up two blue characters.

And this time…I did the same.

My stomach erupted in butterflies when they got married.

Maybe that'd be us one day.

I ended up meeting Nero's grandparents on both sides, a bountiful of aunts and uncles, and even Nero's half brother from his dad's first marriage.

They all welcomed me and patted me on the back as if I was already apart of their family. None of them looked at me weird for being gay or expected me to be something I wasn't.

Like Nero, they liked me for who I was.

Just Virgil.

I was grateful for that, it made the whole thing less nerve wracking.

Even if in the back of my mind…I still knew something was wrong.

Once seven o'clock rolled around, nurse stick-up-her-ass had to come and rain on our parade.

Visiting hours were over and regrettably the family members had to leave one by one, giving me hugs and farewells until it was just me and Nero's parents standing in the lone hospital hallway.

I realized a few things at that moment. The entire hallway smelled like old 409, I hadn't seen bitch secretary in awhile (pray she got fired) and Kyrie's expression said I was in for very bad news.

"Virgil," She choked out ever so slowly. "The treatment just isn't working anymore. We don't know what else to do, his body isn't responding."

"N-No…"

"Yes hun. I'm so, so sorry. I wish I could stand here and reassure you…"

"Don't tell me Nero's stopped fighting! He hasn't! You know he hasn't! He's the strongest person I know, he wouldn't just…give…up…"

"He's not," Mr. Alboeques choked out. "The Leukemia's just…winning."

I refused to hear anymore of this.

How could they stamp an expiration date on their on goddam son?

No.

They're lying.

"They're lying." I hissed, crawling under the love of my life's bed when nobody was looking.

For the two hours I had to stay hidden, I thought about our make believe future. I thought about our little blue house with a white picket fence and our adoptive children.

Nero was my whole future at that point, he was everything to me.

I suppose there was a outcome worse then James cheating on Ingrid, death has a way of out shining anything. If he had ultimately died in the end would the love still be unrequited or…would it be gone?

Maybe you just can't love something that was never here in the first place.

Once lights out rolled around, I slowly crept into Nero's bed, just like all those times before.

Nero's beautiful blue eyes fluttered open as if he was the male version of sleeping beauty.

His poor small body was so entirely frailed at this point that he literally looked like skin and bones. Nero was nothing more then a whisper that was slowly fading away.

"Hey." He whispered, snuggling into the crook of my neck.

"Hey, you can go back to sleep, I just wanted to see you."

"S'alright. I wanted to see you too. It was a big night huh?"

"Yeah. Don't get offended but your family's nuts."

He laughed, causing his whole body to spasm painfully. "Who do you think I take after?"

"Your mom. But your eyes…they're your dad's for sure."

"So everybody says." Another painful laugh that made me flinch.

"Nero I…oh god…I love you so much…"

"I love you too Virg, forever and always."

I was crying now, just full out silent tears that burned my face with every passing second.

"Please Nero…please keep fighting…I can't lose you…I cant! P-Please don't die Nero, I love you so goddam much." The words just kept spilling out and spilling out until I could stop them even if I wanted to.

"Hey," He reached up and wiped a lone tear away. "Hey, look at me Virgil. I'm not going anywhere, I promise. I'll keep fighting, I swear."

"Please." I gasped. I needed to know for sure it was true.

"Have a little faith in me." He whispered.

And so I did.

I clung to him, clung to the hope that he'd be okay, everything would be alright. I clung to his optimistic nature and upbeat qualities. I needed him and he needed me.

"I think it was fate we met at that skate rink; did I ever tell you that?" I shook my head curiously, still half crying. "Why else would we have met? Besides you trying to be noble and heroic. No, I think it was fate. Fate chose us in particular. I think you were always meant to be my guardian angel…"

I looked at Nero, swiftly kissing his cheek before doing the most impulsive thing in my entire existence.

"Marry me." I whispered.

"W-What?"

"Nero Alboeques, I live my life in your lungs, in your every breath of air. Your voice carries lullabies that can comfort and sooth me. Every time you kiss me, it's like the first time, gentle and full of love. I don't think about the leukemia. I don't dare to think it into existence. We love one another and in a crazy messed up world like this one, it's all you can really ask for."

It seemed that a quote from Passion Island was fitting, I knew just by the way Nero's eyes lit up.

"Did you…did you just quote Passion Island?"

"Yes. So would you just give me an answer here? I'm dying."

"Yes!" Nero yelled a bit too loudly. "Yes, yes, yes!"

He closed the few inches and kissed me wildly and sloppily. I smiled, feeling like the happiest man on earth.

"You'd really marry a guy like me?"

"Virgil, you don't give yourself enough credit."

"Fine, fine. Just get some sleep and we'll tell your folks the good news in the morning."

Nero pecked me on the lips once more.

"I love you so fuckin much Virgil Sparda."

"Oh my! Did I just hear you say the 'F' word?"

"Yes, now get over it and go to sleep, make sure to wake me up in the morning, bitchy nurse be dammed."

"Alright baby, I love you."

"Forever and always." Nero whispered.

I never did get to wake Nero up. Since I wasn't blood related, none of the nurses let me in the room. Mourning rights went to family members first and foremost after all.


	20. THE FUTURE AND ALL IT HAS TO OFFER End

Nero Alboeques died on a cool September night, just before autumn had begun. It wasn't a dramatic affair, not like on all those doctor shows where the nurses refused to give up and everyone was rushing around screaming.

No.

He had simply…stopped breathing.

I wish I could say at least the funeral was something spectacular but…it wasn't. There weren't any trumpets playing or doves being released, just an old priest telling everyone god had a plan to follow through with.

Right.

I skipped most of the things I didn't want to be apart of. Not because I was disrespectful.

I wasn't.

I just liked to grieve in my own way.

Later after everyone was gone, I went to his gave, set down his copy of Passion Island, and cried.

The only thing I could possible choke out as the wind howled above was :

"Y-You promised!"

And somehow when a lone green leaf -probably the last of its kind- fell onto my shoulder, I knew Nero was listening.

* * *

THE FUTURE AND ALL IT HAS TO OFFER

* * *

I never fully got over Nero's death.

He was still the boy that impacted my life so fully in a such a short amount of time.

I didn't stop living though, I knew he would want me to go on. So I did.

A month after he died I ended up adopting old Buster from the animal shelter, I know Nero would have loved that.

Then after I graduated I went to college and majored in English and business. I decided first to go through with what Nero always wanted. I started a company on finding better ways for more fuel efficient running cars. Now it's a multimillion dollar idea.

Once that was up and running, I decided to move down to California and buy a house. A bluehouse with a white picket fence by the sea.

Just how he wanted.

That's when everything begun to die down and settle and I begun writing Novels.

Turns out they were pretty good and a publisher hired me, just like Nero said.

And to this day, on each of my New York best selling books, I've written the same dedication:

To my loving husband Nero, who always said anything was possible, as long as you had a little faith and a little optimism.

The end.


End file.
